Sadder but Wiser
by Sarah1281
Summary: Jack can only watch as Louis tries to save him. He wants nothing more than to let him but Hardman's tendrils run deep and already it's too late for him. Missing scene from 5x9 Uninvited Guests.


Louis Litt was, honest to God, trying to save him.

Jack took a moment to try and let that sink in.

"Jack, I'm serious," Louis said earnestly.

Who knew Louis could do earnest so well? Vindictive, petty, holier-than-thou, even professional but earnest? Maybe that explained why Jessica had never quite managed to get rid of him, despite everything, though Jack had never been in a position to see it before now. It made him want to believe him.

"I'm sure you are," he said noncommittally.

It didn't matter. Louis was right and that was the worst part. How had he known? How had he realized that Jack's hand was being forced? Well, Hardman was involved, for one, and the upper echelons at Pearson Spector Litt knew just what kind of a man he was even if most of the partners didn't. Jack himself wouldn't have known if it hadn't been for…Well. That. But Harvey, Jessica, and even Mike (the kid who had impressed him so much he'd decided to actually try and make this thing work) had all written him off as a backstabbing weasel. What made Louis any different?

"Oh, don't give me that," Louis snapped. "Don't just blow me off."

"I'm not trying to blow you off," Jack said. "I just don't see the point in you trying to convince me to tell you about some deep dark secret that you think Daniel Hardman is holding over my head."

"Okay, first of all the fact that I've brought this up like ten times by now and you have yet to deny it is getting pretty conspicuous," Louis said. "And second, that's not what I'm here for. I won't deny that I tried to figure it out but whatever it is, whoever hid it, it's gone and good. It's no surprise a snake like Hardman found it but you're safe from me. You absolutely shouldn't tell us. No good will come to you from both sides knowing."

Jack thought back. Had he really not denied it? He hadn't realized it. Maybe it wasn't surprising. He had spent so long just slugging away, year after year, doing the best he could to prove his work and advance the right way. He was much like Louis in that way except somehow Louis' star had risen and his never had.

Maybe his problem was, ironically enough, a lack of underhanded dealings. No one knew exactly what kinds of problems Louis caused for himself but anything that could make Daniel Hardman promote Louis to senior partner couldn't be good. Jessica liked to keep things 'in the house' and that didn't mean shared with the entire firm. Some things they knew about. Some things really should have gotten him fired. Some things they didn't. Louis resigned under suspicious circumstances then a few weeks later was back as a name partner? Something was wrong with that picture. And Louis himself had brought up Monica Eton himself. He even looked, to his credit, as though it was a ridiculous accusation and there was no reason to pretend now, not with Jack. But there were also plenty of men who had no idea they were sexually harassing someone but it still happened. Who could say what was true?

Maybe Louis was comfortable with all that ambiguity but that had never been Jack. Not since…he hadn't felt he had a choice at the time but now all he could see were choices. Maybe not _good_ choices. Maybe not choices where he wouldn't have lost big. But there were choices and he had been too stupid and too desperate to see them. And now there were no choices. Not unless he wanted to be fired and probably end up in prison. It was still a choice but not one that he could bring himself to take. Did that make him a bad person? He feared the answer was yes.

But didn't any of them understand? Hadn't any of them ever made a mistake and wished they could take it back? One slip-up, one stain on an otherwise exemplary career and it could ruin him. Hardman would make sure of it. Even if he did everything Hardman asked for the rest of his life, and surely he wouldn't be able to stomach that, one day Hardman would watch his life implode. Just because. _That_ was the kind of man Daniel Hardman was. Did none of them understand? Was one little wrong detail back at the start that created an unstable foundation that was forever threatening to crumble and expose him really beyond their comprehension?

Maybe it wasn't beyond Louis'. Maybe that was here. What _did_ he have on Jessica Pearson? Did he help her hide a body once? It all brought him back to the surreality that was Louis trying to save him.

"I have nothing to say on that topic," Jack said, a little more stiffly than he'd like. "But I do thank you for your, uh, consideration."

"Don't thank me," Louis said dismissively. "I'm not here for your gratitude."

"Then what are you here for?" Jack asked. "If I'm not being forced into this then I have no interest in your attempt to talk me down. And if I am, you know there's nothing you can promise me that would make me able to back down."

Louis nodded. "Yeah, I thought about that. And then I realized that there was one thing that might."

"Daniel Hardman's head on a stick?"

Louis blinked. "Okay, maybe there are two ways. But this way doesn't send us to jail for murder."

Jack sighed and made a 'get on with in' motion.

"What if Jessica agreed to make you name partner?"

"What if Harvey confessed his undying love for Robert Zane?" Jack countered.

Louis just stared at him. "What?"

"Sorry, I thought we were listing off things that were never going to happen," Jack said.

"It could happen," Louis said.

"Maybe it could have. Once," Jack said. "But not anymore. My name is getting up on that door? It won't be Jessica Pearson putting it up there. Not after bringing Hardman into this. We both know that."

"Oh, stranger things have happened," Louis said dismissively. "You don't understand, Jack. Jessica _never_ adds anyone to the wall unless her back's up against one, too. This is pretty bad."

"Louis…" Jack trailed off, shaking his head. "Pearson Hardman. Pearson Darby. Pearson Darby Specter. Pearson Specter. Pearson Specter Litt."

"What?"

"How many names is that? Five? In three years? How many times can we change the name of this firm? At some point it gets a little ridiculous."

"Never mind about that," Louis said. "It's a ridiculous objection. And if Hardman wins it's going to change anyway."

"You can't just add people to the wall whenever they challenge Jessica!" Jack exclaimed.

"I think you have a serious misunderstanding of how others names have _ever_ ended up there beside Jessica's," Louis said. "I mean, sure, if everyone knew that then everyone would challenge her and it's be the firm of Pearson Spector Litt and everyone else in the damn building. I legitimately heard Rachel and Donna discussing whether it would be weird to have 'Zane' on two different law firms one time."

"I want to work with Daniel Hardman-"

Louis snorted loudly.

"I'm working with Daniel Hardman," Jack amended. "He promises to put my name on the wall. You want me to back down and go crawling back to Jessica and she promises that she'll put my name on the wall."

"If there's one thing I've learned it's that swallowing your pride is _really_ not as hard as all that," Louis said. "Not when the price is right. And this whole thing started because you wanted to make your mark. Well, we all know you now. You're the reason Mike Ross made partner."

This whole thing had started because he had wanted to fix the glaring salary disparity among the partners and get himself known at the same time. Doing everything asked of him and more for years on end clearly wasn't cutting it. Then Harvey took it as a personal attack because _of course he did_ and Louis came begging to help only to end up backstabbing him because he had such an unstable attachment to Harvey it defied belief. This whole thing started because he had let Hardman get his greedy little hands on his soul.

"Mike Ross is a great kid," Jack said dismissively. "He was always going to make partner. I just sped it up a little."

Louis started coughing. He never could tell what Louis and Mike's relationship actually was.

"Jessica Pearson, Daniel Hardman, what difference does it make?" Jack asked rhetorically. "Of the two, I'm pretty sure only the one wants to rip me limb from limb with her bare hands."

"Jessica usually draws the line at destroying someone professionally," Louis told him. "But that's only if you lose. Which we might do. But come to her now, be her saving grace, stop Hardman from coming back like a disease-ridden cat that just won't die no matter how many times you drop it off of a rooftop…then she might be singing a different tune."

Jack stared at him. "You have the most colorful turn of phrase."

"Thank you, it's a gift," Louis said. "And you know it makes a difference."

"I'll admit that at some point Hardman should really get a better hobby," Jack said. "But if this works he won't need one."

"No, I'm talking about the fact that Hardman embezzled millions of dollars from this firm and that's why Jessica kicked him out in the first place," Louis said.

"Strong words," Jack said. "I don't recall hearing of any charges being filed."

"Jessica signed a nondisclosure agreement or something," Louis said. "I didn't actually look at it so I don't know if I'm bound by that, too. But you already work here. Darby really should have turned him in a few years back but I don't think we're talking to him right now and I sure as hell am not talking to _Nigel_."

"What do you want me to say, Louis?" Jack asked.

"Say that you'll walk away from Hardman," Louis said. "Say that you'll fix this."

"There's nothing to fix, Louis. I chose my side and I'm winning," Jack said calmly.

"That's bullshit and you know it."

"What you know or think you know isn't really relevant," Jack said. "Even if I wanted to, you know Jessica will never forgive me. She already gave me the 'play nice with others' speech about four times and, bizarrely, seemed to think that me making Mike Ross junior partner was some sort of ploy to hurt the firm or something. I still don't know what that's about."

"She could probably smell Hardman," Louis said quickly.

"Smell him?"

Louis nodded. "Do not underestimate that woman. I've been where you are, Jack."

Jack laughed harshly. "You don't even know where I am."

Louis shrugged impatiently. "Maybe not the details, no, but the details don't matter. I've been a lot of places, too. Some of which I can't talk about for legal reasons. I assume you've heard rumors about why I resigned and then came back as managing partner."

"Money's on you had her family kidnapped," Jack said glibly.

Louis ignored that. "Back when I was with Hardman…I was such a fool. He played me like a sap. He made me believe that Jessica cared more about Harvey than me – which, to be fair, she cares about Harvey more than most things – and he gave me things Jessica wasn't prepared to. I owe him a lot. But I don't owe him my soul and neither do you."

"Really, Louis, must you bring souls into this?" Jack asked rhetorically. "It's really unnecessarily dramatic."

"Not with Hardman, it isn't," Louis said grimly. "He set me up as his patsy, you know. If Jessica hadn't done what she did then when the embezzlement came out I would have spent the rest of my life in prison. And he told me it was nothing personal and he'd do it again. And then he expected me to still vote for him. And I did. For a bit. But I was lucky. Harvey and Mike found a way to get us out of this and I was able to get out before it's too late. And that's the kind of chance I want to offer you."

"And how would you do that?" Jack asked skeptically.

"I thought that Harvey and Jessica would never forgive me for what I did. But they did. And then they forgave me for a lot of other things that may have been worse but are really not the point of this conversation," Louis said.

"Well isn't it nice for you that they can find it within their hearts to forgive you on such a regular basis?" Jack asked rhetorically. "It doesn't work like that for the rest of the world. It doesn't work like that for me."

"It can, though," Jack said earnestly. "Come on, Jack. All you've done so far is maybe vote for Harvey to get suspended – though those were secret ballots so I'm not convinced – and suggest we work with Hardman. And that might be enough to make you dead in Jessica's eyes but not mine."

"Well it's too bad, then, that you keep talking about how I need Jessica's forgiveness."

"She will do almost anything to not lose to Daniel Hardman," Louis said. "I'm sure my reason for working with him initially wasn't as good as yours. Whatever that is."

"I appreciate the vote of confidence," Jack said dryly. "I appreciate that you want to think the best of me. But you're wasting your time."

"I don't think so," Louis said. "I think I know a little something about people others write off as a lost cause by now. Come on. What could Hardman have on you that would be worth giving up what I'm offering? What could you possibly want that matters more than being a name partner? That is the goal. You get that and you have _arrived_. Trust me. I know."

What did Hardman have on him? Unfortunately, yes, it was worth more than that. So much more.

"Louis-"

"Come on, Jack," Louis said. "At least let me talk to Jessica."

"You're never going to convince her," Jack said. "I mean, we all knew Harvey was her heir apparent and whatever happened with you two happened mostly behind closed doors. Jessica can't very well have me trying to bring Hardman in and then changing my mind and becoming a name partner. Not unless she wants everybody to know."

"At least let me try," Louis said again, maddeningly sincere. "Please. What do you have to lose? There could be a way out of this for all of us yet. We could still all win. Except for goddamn Hardman but him losing is just a fringe benefit, really. Let him crawl back under that rock for another year."

What could he say to Louis with him standing there looking at him like that? Hardman would never let him go. He had too much on him for Jack to ever be able to walk away. Jessica would never agree to Louis' absurdly kind proposal.

Louis was just wasting his time. Wasting all of their time.

But maybe, for just this moment, he could pretend.

"Sure, Louis. Go talk to Jessica and…" He paused. "We'll see."


End file.
